Ah, remember the ‘Ode to Anal: The Formative Years‘? I’ve been meaning to write more of that series for ages. Well, I’m bringing it back.
Have you ever noticed that you project your fantasies on people? When I was younger and wanted a boyfriend, I used to fantasize about going on a date with Elijah [...]

[Read more →]

Or, Why I’m Never Going to a Party at the Fuckhouse Ever Again.
This is my blog. I’ll tell the stories I want, as they happened, and how they made me feel, goddamnit. So anyone who has a problem with this can suck my balls.
Necessary Information: Most of you who know me in the real [...]

[Read more →]

Thing 1 is flipping out.
I have two flatmates; Daniel, and Thing 1. Thing 1 is so named, because I used to think of the both of them as Thing 1 and Thing 2, when walking home and seeing the lights of their bedrooms on. And I don’t give enough of a shit to come up [...]

[Read more →]

I love the senses we were gifted with.
Two of my senses are normal, but well loved.
My sense of touch is wonderful. I’m a tactile person. I love to touch things. People, art, animals, walls…I love to touch. I love the feel of an object under my fingers.
My sense of taste is also awesome. I love [...]

[Read more →]

There are a few (very few) upsides to having male roommates, especially a male roommate who you have dated. They kill the big icky bugs (I was a funeral director. Most bugs don’t bother me, but roaches make me scream like a girl) They open jars. They change the light bulbs I can’t reach.
And then, [...]

[Read more →]